Category: loss

once

Unwilled and unchanging was the folly of adolescence. Each individual succumbed to its predictable pattern, yet no know decipher it until they were left in it’s wake, burned and aged.

Lucky enough to have loved in adolescences’ tight grip and to enjoy the rose coloured world even it if ephemeral. The world was different with your presence and together, a world of our own. Created in love’s tender image, always fond in my memory.

Face to face with you now, maturity stricken and beaten down by adulthood, the world of our past lives, only now, a fleeting reality. Played on loop and kept alive by the endless possibilities of Divine Providence it is suspended in another present, unknown to us.

I will look at you with admiration, for to have shared this with you will always be an honour. This will be the only eternity we will know because it is the only thing we can both be sure of.

my roses

Fresh water for the vase
to place the flowers in.
The red roses, you know I love.
Sat on the windowsill faced toward the sun.
I say ‘you really didn’t have to’
You smile and say ‘of course I did’
Placing a kiss on my lips.

They are still there, on my windowsill.
Withering away.
You are not here to replace them.
I watch each day as a leaf or a petal drops.
Until one day, it is just stems, and the memory of your kiss.

i am not ready

Stirring in the night, a tortured soul. Pain, heavy chest, broken cries. Weariest eyes, endurance, only just persevering. You tell me you can’t much longer. ‘Please’ I whisper. I am not ready.

A look. A thousand words within it. A deep breath, cracks my heart and twists my lungs. I plead with the clock- be my friend today. Make this moment last. A look. I know it can’t.

Quivering lip, gentle touches. ‘It is okay’. Lies bring comfort. Let us dream now, dream always. Time is ours here, we are forever. Infinite beings, no disease, no problems.

Then the moment when they take you away. But you are mine, I am yours, you belong somewhere. How will you find me? How will I breathe? How will I be, when I am not ready?

 

‘I am ready, let me go’.